Wake Me Up When September Ends

I feel the need to write tonight although I have no reason or inspiration to do so. I can’t think of anything to say that won’t sound like everything I’ve said here before. If I write anything at all, it’ll be woven around my standard nonsense- those stale ideas of constancy, numbness, discomfort, timelessness, changelessness, hopelessness, unease. They are like the keywords in describing my every experience. So any effort to put down thoughts is guaranteed to fail.

I dive into a fictitious world every free waking minute of my life, unless my mind is too tired for it. And that happens way too often. My Neural Networks are catching dust, poor Na+ ions seem to be perception perplexed. And the neurotransmitters are probably on a holiday. It’s a state that is inflexible and unaccommodating. It causes reluctance to carry out activities that are typically fun. Quite plainly, it’s dull and renders one incapable of exercising will. The psychologist calls it unresolved conflict. The psychiatrist calls it a mood disorder. The pragmatist calls it a phase. The theorist calls it a threshold. The artist observes silently. The narcissist calls it (pronouncedly) idiocy. The commoner calls it sadness. The realist calls it life. 

And Mr. Jainendra Shukla calls it "Happy Learning".

I’m eating my sandwich in LPU and daydreaming away royally. Two girls I haven’t noticed yet seat themselves at a comfortable distance. The next minute, I snap back to my surroundings with a start when I suddenly hear, 'That’s my FAVOURITE track EVER!'.

I join my few friends in LPU. Often taking individuals or groups of people into perspective and belittling them for how stupid/frivolous they are – not only obscenely elaborately but also with an obnoxiously high degree of superiority-complex. To what end? Except for a few great laughs, nothing. The answers lie in that place where all these defense & learning mechanisms of neurons originate.

Summer has come and past. But still the 1-pm direct heat on the forehead feels incredible, almost like a physical blessing. Long walks on sultry afternoons are therapeutic. I colour the world around with the music in my ears. Life becomes easy again, free of bother – in harmony with my surroundings.